MD and Chef Team - The Show!

It's Gonna Be, OK!

March 15, 2022 Dr. Isabel MD & Culinary Nutrition Expert Chef Michael Season 3 Episode 6
MD and Chef Team - The Show!
It's Gonna Be, OK!
Show Notes Transcript

The second try is almost always the best!

These ladies had a technical glitch on their first time together, however this time they bring the Fire.   🔥🔥🔥

🔵  Dr. Roseann is a mental health trailblazer, founder of The Global Institute of Children’s Mental Health and Dr. Roseann, who is on a mission to change the way we view and treat mental health, showing people it's gonna be ok with science-backed tools that improve wellbeing.

🔵  She is known for teaching how to calm the brain in order to have a happy family and giving the keys to unlock the brain’s potential.

🔵  With her trademarked method, BrainBehaviorReset™,  she has helped thousands address the most challenging conditions such as ADHD, executive functioning, anxiety, OCD, mood, Lyme, and PANS/PANDAS using science-backed holistic therapies.

➥ She is an author of three books including her most recent book, It’s Gonna be OK!™ and is a media personality who is featured on dozens of media outlets.

⏬   Download and Listen to the Full Story! 

➥  Where listeners can find
Dr. Roseann's info and website -
  https://drroseann.com     

➥  Learn about Dr. Roseann here -
https://drroseann.com/about-dr-roseann/

➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ 

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Speaker 0 (0s): Coming up on this episode of the MD and chef team show, 

Speaker 1 (8s): I'm scared. I'm, I'm actually scared for our society. I've never, I'm such a positive person, but we all have the power within ourselves to change ourselves. And we have to change this toxic level of angst and stress that everyone seems to be letting eclipse their lives. You know? 

Speaker 0 (28s): Absolutely. I, I, I definitely agree with you on that. And, and, and we just need to empower the parents because empowered parents will be calmer and there'll be able to help their kids. Right. 

Speaker 1 (39s): And they will know that they have the tools. Like I think the hardest thing is when you see your no mother is happy and no parent is, you're only as happy as your happiest kid. Right. 

Speaker 0 (50s): Welcome to the show from 

Speaker 2 (53s): Shop team. 

Speaker 0 (54s): I'm Dr. Isabel medical doctor here at the MD and chef team. And who are you? 

Speaker 2 (59s): Chef? Michael Coleman nutrition expert. I'm the chef part of the kids. 

Speaker 0 (1m 3s): And what are we going to talk about bed now? I can see that cause he's my husband. 

Speaker 2 (1m 7s): Yeah. Well, we'll be talking about marriage relationship, parenting intimacy. Talk about mindsets that success, overcoming depression, anxiety. I'll be getting into functional nutrition, recipes and tips from the kitchen. And we're going to both get into how to live a long, healthy, vibrant life. 

Speaker 0 (1m 26s): Yes. I love it. Our mission is to help you prevent and reverse disease and give you both in the process. Oh yeah. Hi Rosanne. How are you doing 

Speaker 1 (1m 46s): Well? I'm doing great. I'm looking forward to this conversation because this is, we had a little technical difficulties the last time. So I'm super excited that we're able to talk about kids' mental health and what parents can do. 

Speaker 0 (1m 58s): Yes. And actually, I can hear you. I can see you this time. It was such a drag that, that didn't happen last year, but I'm so glad that we connected today. 

Speaker 1 (2m 7s): Yes. 

Speaker 0 (2m 8s): Hey, where are you? 

Speaker 1 (2m 9s): I am in Connecticut, outside of New York city. I'm like considered the suburbs of New York city. 

Speaker 0 (2m 18s): Okay. And how's the weather you guys are in winter. I know we're in summer here in New Zealand. 

Speaker 1 (2m 24s): Yeah, it is. And I'm going to tell you that, you know, one of my best friends lives in New Zealand and boy, you have some strict government policies there and you're never going to see her for like years now. You know what I mean? So it is cold and it is not a bad day. It's 40 degrees. So that's considered pretty warm. 

Speaker 0 (2m 46s): 40 degrees here in New Zealand is about, let me see about 15. It's about 12 degrees centigrade. I had to learn all that when we moved here 20 years ago. Hey, Roseanne, how about if I introduce you to our listeners? Cause I haven't done that formally and then we'll take it away. All right. 

Speaker 1 (3m 8s): Yes. 

Speaker 0 (3m 9s): Hi everyone. Welcome to the MD and chef team. I'm your host, Dr. Isabel. And today we get to talk to Dr. Rosanne. Copana Hodge from Connecticut America. I'm just going to share with you a little bit about her story, and then we'll go ahead and start asking questions. Okay. Ready? All right. Here we go. Dr. Roseanne is a doctor of psychology and is a mental health trailblazer. I love that trailblazer. 

It is we're breaking ground. Aren't we 

Speaker 1 (3m 43s): Well on a disruptor. 

Speaker 0 (3m 47s): Oh me. Till I'm going to join 

Speaker 1 (3m 49s): Disrupting 

Speaker 0 (3m 51s): And founder of the global Institute of children's mental health and Dr. Rosanne Copana hot, who is changing the way we view and treat children's mental health Forbes magazine called her a thought leader in children's mental health. Her work has helped thousands reduce and reverse symptoms associated with the most challenging conditions facing our children today, such as ADHD, anxiety, mood, autism, learning, disability, lime, wow, pans and pandas, which we will be talking about using proven holistic therapies, such as neurofeedback, biofeedback, and psychotherapy. 

She is the neurofeedback, a biofeedback. I'm sorry. She is go back a second for, and I'll just say she is the author of the first ever book on teletherapy activities for children and adolescents therapies called teletherapy toolkit. And that is trademark and Roseanne's mission is to teach parents how to reduce and reverse their child's symptoms. Using proven natural therapies in her book. It's going to be okay. 

And the get unstuck program. I love those titles because parents, parents need help. They're not getting it. You can't be getting this in your doctor's office. It's just, there's not enough time. 

Speaker 1 (5m 23s): No, and it's more than that. They're just not understanding what's going on. And then, you know, we just don't have good solutions that are, we have good solutions. We're not talking about solutions that are accessible for parents. 

Speaker 0 (5m 36s): Yes. And what I, what I want to talk about before we begin all these questions is I just want to say I do not like the word mental illness, because I have suffered from mental illness and I hate being called mentally ill. You think you're crazy. It's not illness. It's all about brain health. And realizing that if we've got good brain health, we're going to have great mental health. 

If we know how to take care of this organ in our brain, right, then, 

Speaker 1 (6m 12s): Then 

Speaker 0 (6m 12s): We will live a better life. So I want everybody to take off the post-it of mental illness and put on it's all about brain health, because brain health leads to good mental health. And that's what we're trailblazing, right? 

Speaker 1 (6m 25s): I mean, that really is. I mean, that's what I've been doing for 30, over 30 years that I've been talking about that. And it's about, you know, the fancy word, you know, words is that nervous system dysregulation, right? So there are many things that get our brain to not become right. But then there's a lot of things that we're not talking about that calm that brain. And without a calm rain, we can't think properly, we can't pay attention. 

And we certainly don't take the kind of actions we want to take. And then mental health issues arise and we make it sound like, oh, you have depression or you have anxiety or OCD that there's nothing you can do unless you take a pill. And that is just not true. And it is removing the power that you have within yourself for yourself or your child or your family. And it's leading to everybody being spieling. So out of control, and this was occurring long before the pandemic is just the pandemic through, you know, made this fire much bigger. 

Speaker 0 (7m 34s): Oh, absolutely. I agree with you. I wanted to ask you why are children and teens so anxious? Not just because of the pandemic, but in general, what is going on? 

Speaker 1 (7m 45s): Well, Dr. Isabel, I think that there are it's multifaceted. So I would love to say that there's one answer, but I can tell you that we are all letting compounded stress and it's not stress. That's all bad. We are living very intense lives and our nervous system, our brain doesn't know the difference between good or bad stress. And that compounded stress is causing families to dysregulate kids, to dysregulate. 

We've. We have the most overwhelmed parents right now than we have ever in history and parents are doing the best they can. So I'm not saying this to make anybody feel guilty, but when you are super stressed, it doesn't matter what comes out of your mouth. It's what you're showing your kids, how you're managing that. So if you're tense and you're pulling your hair out of your irritable, that is what your kids see. And there is a compounded negative offense effect of that. And at our office, we talk about sharing the calm, right sharing. 

The calm means when you're regulated, the people around you, your kids get to share in that regulation is called co-regulation. We call it sharing the calm. And this is a major reason why kids are struggling, compounded stressors, just stressed families, poor coping skills. Kids today do not have stress tolerance. And you know how you view a stressor is a hundred percent how your body reacts to it. 

So, you know, if you're like, oh my God, here's here. This is a terrible thing. And it's a little thing, right? Oh, you know, my show is on. I'm so upset. I'm in a rage. Well, your nervous system response to that. And the more it happens, the more you get into a stress state and chronic stress, we know through research leads to clinical conditions like anxiety and depression and OCD. 

Speaker 0 (9m 47s): Gosh, that's really, that's really pins, pinpoints. The fact that parents need help because 

Speaker 1 (9m 54s): I need to take care of themselves or worse. I mean, we're all guilty of it. We don't do A low, 

Speaker 0 (10m 2s): How many kids do you have? 

Speaker 1 (10m 3s): I have two boys. 

Speaker 0 (10m 5s): Yeah. I have two girls they're adult now, but I can see how in the past, I wouldn't, I didn't know how to self-regulate. And so my emotions would bleed into them and you know, 

Speaker 1 (10m 15s): Absolutely. And I think, you know, we make everything so hard. We make everything like mental health and addressing it is like the biggest mountain you'll ever have to CLI climb. And I challenged that. I think that simple actions have create profound change. And I think the harder part is that we are living in a, you know, I have a magic wand on my desk because people think there's a magic wand that there's something, a pill they can take for one action. 

Okay. That's gonna make it better. And in it's a lot of little actions that create big waves. And I think when people start to realize that's lifestyle changes, like when you take care of your brain, you reap the benefits. Right. And you feel so different, you know, 

Speaker 0 (11m 14s): But we're so trained. We're so trained to think it's just this magic pill. And it's like, oh my gosh, you guys have 

Speaker 1 (11m 22s): It. Doesn't change your behavior. It may, it may, for some, I don't get to see those people and those kids, it may for some calm, your nervous system, but mostly it doesn't. It produces a lot of side effects, which counter any positive effect you might have. So I, we have to change this dialogue and I'm, I'm just sick of parents not being empowered for this change. It's like today, somebody called them. They're like, why didn't I know about this? Why aren't people talking about this? Why isn't, I'm like, well, I'm out there talking about it. That's why I do all these things. 

But we have to share this information with people. You know, like if this is a podcast that you're listening to and you know, somebody which you do, you know, a lot of people whose kids are struggling with mental health, you need to share this with them because people are hurting in a way that I have never, ever seen in my entire life. 

Speaker 0 (12m 15s): Me, the doctor was, I'm 

Speaker 1 (12m 16s): Scared. I'm actually scared for our society. I've never, I'm such a positive person, but we all have the power within ourselves to change ourselves. And we have to change this toxic level of angst and stress that everyone seems to be letting eclipse their lives. You know? 

Speaker 0 (12m 35s): Absolutely. I, I, I definitely agree with you on that. And, and, and we just need to empower the parents. Cause the empowered parents will be calmer and there'll be able to help their kids. Right. 

Speaker 1 (12m 47s): They will know that they have the tools. Like I think the hardest thing is when you see your no mother is happy and no parent is, you're only as happy as your happiest kid. Right. But It's 

Speaker 0 (12m 58s): So 

Speaker 1 (12m 59s): True. So true. But like when parents are like, what should I do? How do I do it? And they're up searching all night on the internet. This is what people's lives are like, and it's not okay that we're not sharing this, this kind of, these kinds of tools and resources. So I'm all about kids' mental health solutions. I mean, you, you look at me on Instagram. It says kids mental health solutions, right. Because that's what we need to talk about. Yes. I can talk about the neuroscience of stress and anxiety and OCD. 

And that's important. Don't get me wrong, but I want you to put a fire under your butt to create some lifestyle changes that we're all capable of. 

Speaker 0 (13m 38s): So let's talk about some of those, some, what are some of the natural therapies to reduce and reverse our children's? 

Speaker 1 (13m 47s): So I dive super deep into this and my book it's going to be okay. But there are many things that people can do. Some are free, some are things that you have to invest in, and it really depends on what's going on. Right? So, you know, things that you can do right away are breath work, right? So breath work is I started doing breath work when my youngest was maybe like 18 months, two years, and very capable of doing it short amount of time. 

Why do we do it? Everything we need to do all of these tools I'm going to talk about right now do one thing. They calm the brain. And without a regulated nervous system, again, we cannot take action. We cannot learn. We can't. And you can't, you know, my, my methodology is brain behavior reset. You have to calm the brain. You have to learn new skills to address behavior so that you can reset, right? You can't just keep doing the same thing. 

Somehow in mental health, people feel very comfortable about doing the same things over and over that don't work. Like most people come to me and they've tried, you know, eight medications and they had terrible effects. And they're like, but I didn't know because that's what my doctor was telling me. And I'm like, well, I'm sorry. Your physician decided to try that eight times. And didn't run a genetics test to determine if you could even metabolize these things. So we want it. You can't. The definition of insanity is Albert Einstein says, is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. 

Speaker 0 (15m 26s): Calling all women. Are you feeling depressed, anxious, lacking an energy, having problems sleeping all night long, waking up with brain fog, or maybe even hopelessness. And you know that there is a better you that wants to come out. Hello, it's me, Dr. Isabel. And wow. If any of this sounds like you, I get you. I have been in this place and I really wish someone who really knew what I was going through would have been there to help me through to the other side of that deep dark place. 

That's why I started the shame-free anxiety and depression community for women only. It's a free and private Facebook group. Would you like weekly coaching to help you become your best self? And how about be inspired and encouraged by other women in the community? We now know that we grow better in community and not alone. The link is in the podcast description, or you can search in Facebook for the shame-free anxiety and depression community for women it's free, it's private and it's safe. 

I hope to see you there soon and now back to the podcast. 

Speaker 1 (16m 52s): So I want to flip that script and I want parents to know you have to calm that brain. And then, you know, so breath, work, gratitude, affirmations, visualization, techniques, biofeedback, and then something I do a lot, which is neurofeedback, which could be its own podcast doctor as well. But essentially it's a therapy where the brain through technology learns to go from a dysregulated, either under overstimulated state, which a variety behaviors like unfocused, angry, you name, it can result. 

You use the computers and you teach the brain to get into a regulated state and it gets reinforced to do it. And it's super, super simple. It's based on opera and conditioning and, and you're watching a movie and your brain in two to three seconds will produce the exact combination that somebody like me, who determines that you need to achieve to be in a regulated state, two to three seconds, your brain will instantaneously produce a healthy combination. You need to do a number of sessions. 

Typically most people do 40 or so sessions to get it, to learn, to be in a healthy state. So it's safe. It's really effective. It's just, you know, it's not inexpensive and it's time-consuming, but it's a lot cheaper than 10 years or 20 years. It takes on average 11 years from the start of a problem for somebody gets appropriate. Mental health help, according to NAMI. So 11 years of heartache versus time putting in time and doing about six months of treatment can be pretty dramatic and the changes and you have to do if you're, if you're anxious person and you're have, or OCD, or are you depressed behaviors that you're repeating, you have to address that in therapy too. 

But therapy only works when the platform is a regulated nervous system. 

Speaker 0 (18m 55s): So 

Speaker 1 (18m 56s): Got to work on common. That brain is all those things and more nutrition, exercise. All those things have a dramatic impact on the brain. And there's tons of research to show that I have 40 pages of research citations in my book. 

Speaker 0 (19m 12s): Yeah. Food. Oh my God. Oh my gosh, the food people are eating. It's just all sugar. I mean, yeah, 

Speaker 1 (19m 21s): Of course. All bad. 

Speaker 0 (19m 23s): People don't know how to eat. 

Speaker 1 (19m 25s): No. And they drink and adults drank a lot of alcohol to self-medicate and smoke a lot of marijuana. 

Speaker 0 (19m 31s): I know it's like the normal. 

Speaker 1 (19m 33s): Yeah. And I'm not against cannabis, but I am against cannabis when you're using it all the time. Right. So it is a psychedelic and I'd rather see you use CBD, but you know, most of my excessive cannabis users are stuck. They're not living productive lives. So I can't say, oh yeah, that's a great thing. But, and a lot of people are drinking three to six drinks a night. 

Speaker 0 (19m 59s): I know here. I know we always, we always coach people here at doctor on admission only for, I'm not a fan of alcohol because I come from an alcoholic father and it's just terrible. And it just is not a good way to, to take care of yourself. So we always teach people only four drinks a week. And so when you ask somebody, okay, all right. So here's a quiz. How many glasses of wine are there in a bottle of wine? I've got people saying three glasses of wine, a bottle of wine. 

I go wrong answer. It's seven, there's seven glasses of wine. So you shouldn't be drinking any more than just a little bit of half in a week. People are blown away here in New Zealand. 

Speaker 1 (20m 42s): Yeah, I have. I mean, I know people that drink a lot, You know what I mean? So, and again, why are you drinking? What's behind it? Are you going out and having fun, whatever, and you're being safe. Great. What are you drinking? Because you're trying to self-medicate you got a problem. You got to get to the root cause. Right. You know, And what you put in your mouth affects your brain. It's kind of common sense. And so you can, instead of thinking about what you're missing out on sugar and gluten and dairy, think about what you are eating. 

Right. Like I just had stuffed chicken breasts would pursue dough and artichoke and spinach and garlic. And it had, it had non-dairy cheese in it. It was damn good. Everybody just want everybody know. So 

Speaker 0 (21m 34s): Are you Italian? 

Speaker 1 (21m 36s): Oh, I'm a hundred percent. So I'm first generation. So I love to cook. So it is the only other career that I actually seriously considered. I just love it. It makes me feel it's my Zen. 

Speaker 0 (21m 49s): Oh yeah, totally. 

Speaker 1 (21m 50s): It makes other people so happy when I cook for them. So it's like, I love that part of it. So, and my mom taught me, she's an amazing cook. Like she can make anything, tastes like a gourmet meal, like, and she just cooks in that authentic kind of true Italian way, not American Italian way. 

Speaker 0 (22m 10s): What part of Italy or 

Speaker 1 (22m 11s): Near Naples would be the closest major city. 

Speaker 0 (22m 15s): Nice. Nice. 

Speaker 1 (22m 16s): Yeah. 

Speaker 0 (22m 18s): I wanted to ask you before I ask you the next question about breath work, just very simply. Can you explain to our, to our listeners how to do breath work? 

Speaker 1 (22m 28s): Yeah. So there are many types of breaths and there is not one that is better than another. It's what works for you. And the point of breathwork is that we are chest breathing. And when we chest breathe, we are causing our nervous system to stay in a more elevated state. And what we want to do is breathe into our belly. It's called diaphragmatic breathing. And my, my personal favorite breath is, and I have it up on YouTube is a four 70. 

And so you're breathing in for four seconds and then you're holding and then you're breathing in through your nose, four seconds, hold for seven and then exhale for eight. And it's the, you want to do it at least three rounds. And I like to do it three rounds, at least three times a day. You can do it 10 times a day. It's it's easy. And it's going to train your nervous system to get into relaxed state, okay. 

Athletes just go in, you know, go to the practice for a week. They got to do it all the time to keep the muscles and the brain and everything worked. You want to treat your brain like this Primo thing, that it is not feed it with Cheetos and B and not taking care of yourself. It's super, super important to take care of yourself. 

Speaker 0 (23m 53s): I know it's so good. And I love that. And just very simply three times a day, you can do it while you're driving. You 

Speaker 1 (23m 59s): Put it on your timer. 

Speaker 0 (24m 0s): That's right. That's right. Good point. Excuse. Hey, I also want it to ask you, can you share with us, what is pans? P a N S and Panis and a E. And how, and how is it treated? I know you can't do it all. 

Speaker 1 (24m 17s): Yeah, no, but I can give you everyone needs to know about this. So these are three separate clinical conditions that result from infectious disease. Mostly some T pans, toxic trigger AEP. And what, what happens is we have a rise in infectious disease. Hello, we're living in the time of COVID and this is actually possible with COVID. So clinical conditions such as Epstein bar, which is motto Lyme disease, COVID the body gets a misdirected immune response and starts attacking itself. 

Right? I forget what the name of it. They're calling it with COVID, but it's like systemic, blah, blah, blah, activation. And, and what happens is when you have this massive brain inflammation, you're going to have cognitive or psychiatric problems. And with pans and pandas, it is a sudden sort of overnight type of thing. Auto-immune and stuff, a lot apathy a, he is, it can be sort of a waxing and waning. So for example, pan does the longer version, right? 

I always like to say that that only comes from strep group, a strep, and a person gets exposed to strap. Some person, people get treated and it goes away. But with somebody, with pandas, the immune system starts attacking itself and gets into this hypervigilant state and things like restricted eating, eating disorder, OCD can happen and it's sudden, and it's intense and it's scary. Some people have milder versions of things, and then it's a deep acceleration. 

So it's not like you can have anything before. It's just like, when you know somebody who has this, they will tell you, oh my gosh, all of a sudden I got OCD after I had COVID or something like that. And it's not just COVID again, there are multiple conditions. So one in 200, one and T 150 200 kids have this. They now have included the P stands for pediatric pants does not have an age of onset limitation. 

So it can occur at any age. It can occur at 81 or two. So that's a great thing because you know, there's lots of people who we know have chronic Lyme. And now we're starting to understand that it's not as simple as, as this. And most people with pans, pans have multiple infections, viruses and different health issues that are really driving their mental health problem. So some of the medical reason for health problems 

Speaker 0 (27m 5s): Yes. And it affects the brain, our 

Speaker 1 (27m 8s): Brain, the brain. Absolutely. And there's very few of us. This is my specialty area. There's very few of us that support this population. And, and it's, you know, you can find providers on organizations like aspire.com, excuse me, aspire.care. In international. I lads for Lyme disease. There's nonprofit organizations that are, you know, where you can go and find a provider like myself, even though I work with people remotely, all over the world. 

Speaker 0 (27m 41s): Oh you do? 

Speaker 1 (27m 42s): I do 

Speaker 0 (27m 43s): Great. That's very good. Okay. So I wanted to ask you, you know, I always like our team to have at least three action steps so that they can start winning right away. Cause parents are like, tell me what to do. So can you share three action steps for them to win? 

Speaker 1 (27m 58s): Absolutely. And, and they're all tied together. Okay. So I think the three things that parents need to do is number one, you have to focus on calming the brain of your kid in your family. Okay? So we, we went through different activities. What works for you? Is it prayer in the morning? Right? I do prayer and I like candles. That is very helpful for me and the lighting. The candles forces me to slow my butt down and kind of ground and be present. 

And also I do a lot of positive affirmations and things. What I do and that's important part is I do a lot of other things. People I'm walking the walk, I don't just say too, you need to have autonomy parenting. We are a society of bubble wrap parenting, where kids do not know how they, don't not given an opportunity to fail and be independent. So as much as you can let your kid naturally fail. And sometimes it means a bad grade. People, your kids need to have a tolerance and three it's teaching coping skills. 

And that's about that autonomous parenting part. So when we teach kids how to cope and we shift our language. So instead of saying to a kid and constantly rescuing them, like, you know, you got a bad grade, oh God, we got a bad grade. You didn't get it last time. What did you do differently? No, I, I, I don't know. I didn't do this. You have to start getting your kids to be critical thinkers and problem solvers. And today our kids are struggling because they just don't have coping skills and stress tolerance. 

And you want your kids to have lifelong mental health boy, they need coping skills. And it's our job as parents to give them, to help them support that. And all of those things are integrated. And you know, you know, it's great to go to Disney world. It's great to give your kid the best car seat or a fancy car or private school. But if they don't have a regulated brain, nothing is going to stick to that. You know? 

And if your kid isn't regulated, their self-esteem is going to be off. And you know, if you don't feel good about yourself, nothing positive success is impossible. If you don't feel good about yourself, 

Speaker 0 (30m 19s): I love that. That was so good. Let your kids fail so that they can build resiliency, learn how to get back up. 

Speaker 1 (30m 27s): Great. And they can figure stuff. You don't want them to be in, in college. You know what I mean? So I was talking, my, my youngest is 11 and he's like an old man. And he, I was just telling him he's doing an autobiography and he was doing his future self and I'll make this quick. And it was really sweet. And I said to him, I'm not going to worry about you because you were such a good decision maker. And you know, I, I was just telling him this, this morning in the car and we're driving. 

And I love those conversations when you're kid in the car, you know? And I said, John Carlo, you know, when, when I went to college, people like drank a bottle of wine. They never even had a drink. And he's like, why would they do that? And I said, because their parents didn't teach him how to make decisions for themselves. And he's like, shouldn't, they only have a glass of wine. That's what I would do. And I was like, exactly. I said, mommy's not going to worry about you. You, you don't do anything. Doesn't feel good to you. And that's because you, you learned how to make decisions for yourself, you know? 

And you want your kids to be decision, good decision makers when you're not around people. And that only happens if they have exposure to failure and they know what it feels like. And then they know the success they can have by figuring stuff out on their own. And this is the demise of our culture. Like I can tell you over the 30 years, the difference in this has been sadly, it's been a major contributor, a negative contributor to the mental health of our, of our entire generation. And we can flip that. 

Speaker 0 (32m 2s): Oh yeah. And, and definitely by following you, Dr. Roseanne is definitely a great way because I want to applaud you right then. And there, when you were talking to your son, you were speaking into him, you are a good decision maker. Well, guess what? That gets tattooed into his brain, into his house. I'm a good decision maker. I make decisions. And 

Speaker 1 (32m 23s): I told them, you always trust your gut. 

Speaker 0 (32m 25s): Yeah. Right. 

Speaker 1 (32m 26s): He's a great kid. But when he says, no, it ain't gonna happen. Right. It can happen. He's 99%. Like, but I, my mother empowered me to not give a crap what people thought and to make decisions that felt right to me, never to be rude, never to be disrespectful. Well, I mean, unless somebody was being back, you know, but not to take crap from people and to listen to myself. And I can't tell you, not only how I benefited from that, but when I went off to college and how I helped people, and obviously I'm helping people today, but I saw my friends when I went to college in the late eighties, really make dangerous decisions for themselves. 

And if I was not around, I can't even tell you how many of my friends would have died of alcohol poisoning. Been raped, done stupid stuff, because they were never allowed to make independent decisions because somebody was bubble wrapping them. And we are moved. So beyond a little helicoptering at this point, it is like, nobody wants their kid to have an emotion. That's not negative. We're supposed to feel uncomfortable so that we 

Speaker 0 (33m 39s): Feel your feelings, 

Speaker 1 (33m 41s): Feel your body. Don't ignore it, process it and be like, okay, I'm angry. 

Speaker 0 (33m 47s): Get out, talk it out. This is okay. You can talk. If you're sad, you can talk. You don't have to kill yourself because 

Speaker 1 (33m 54s): You also can say, I experienced this. And I don't like it. What can I do differently next time? 

Speaker 0 (34m 2s): Right? 

Speaker 1 (34m 3s): Like, instead people are like, oh, I'm just going to take this pill. I'm going to keep doing the same thing. And I'm just going to take this pill. So I'm numb, or I'm just going to sit around and drink alcohol. I'm going to watch Netflix for three days. So we've got to change things. And it's about empowering ourselves with tools. 

Speaker 0 (34m 21s): Right. 

Speaker 1 (34m 21s): And there are lots of them and they're not that hard. 

Speaker 0 (34m 25s): And so where can people find you so that they can get your book and stay in contact with you? 

Speaker 1 (34m 31s): Yeah. So you can go to Dr. Rosanne everywhere. And that's D R R O S E a N N. That's dot com. You can get all my stuff there. You can. Dr. Rosanna, Instagram, Tik, TOK, YouTube, Facebook. It's  somebody took Dr. Rosanna. I don't know how they dared to do that, but, but you can just go to Dr. rosanne.com and most of the resources are there. 

Speaker 0 (34m 56s): Excellent. And it'll all be all the links will be in our show notes. We promise. All right. Thank you so much, Dr. Roseanne, for being with us. I appreciate this 

Speaker 1 (35m 4s): Conversation. So 

Speaker 0 (35m 6s): We'll stay in contact, definitely your, your money. You're my kind of people 

Speaker 1 (35m 12s): Stick together. 

Speaker 0 (35m 13s): Yeah, girl. All right, everybody. Thank you for joining us. And you know what? We'll be back. We'll have more to share with you to empower you, to help you become your best self. And before I go, please remember to remain unstoppable. Okay. I love you have a wonderful day later. 

Speaker 2 (35m 38s): Hello, chef Michael here. If you enjoy today's episode, we would love it. If you subscribe to the podcast and left us a review.