MD and Chef Team - The Show!

Create a Fulfilling Life with Dr. Foojan Zeine

January 25, 2022 Dr. Isabel MD & Culinary Nutrition Expert Chef Michael Season 3 Episode 2
MD and Chef Team - The Show!
Create a Fulfilling Life with Dr. Foojan Zeine
Show Notes Transcript

🔸 Dr. Foojan Zeine is a Psychotherapist, Radio/podcast host, International Speaker, and author. She has her Doctorate in Clinical Psychology and is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist practicing online and in her office in Southern California.

🔸 Dr. Zeine is the originator of “Awareness Integration” educational and psychological theory and intervention, and the author of 6 books including Life Reset – The Awareness Integration Path to Create the Life You Want.

🔸 She has authored and co-authored 5 books, and is the host of A Heartfelt Chat with Dr. Foojan at KMET1490AM/ ABC Radio. She has also appeared on the Dr. Phil show as a guest speaker in universities including Harvard.

⏬   Download and Listen to the Full Story! 

Where listeners can find Dr. Foojan's book LifeReset

Dr. Foojan Zeine website -

            ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ ➖ 

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Speaker 0 (0s): Coming up on this episode of the MD and chef team show 

Speaker 1 (8s): And to the present moment, which is what action happens, which your intention and action happens clean up the past and envision a future that calls you forward. And then come back systematically as if like you've got a camera in and a camera out. And you constantly doing today watching, observing, intending. So you don't have, you don't get stuck a lot in a lot of the noise anymore. 

Speaker 0 (35s): Welcome to the show from . I'm Dr. Isabel medical doctor here at the MD and chef team. And who are you? 

Speaker 2 (44s): Chef Michael Connor and nutrition experts. I'm the chef part of the team. 

Speaker 0 (48s): And what are we going to talk about bed? Now? I can see that cause he's my husband. 

Speaker 2 (54s): We'll be talking about marriage relationships, parenting intimacy. Talk about mindsets that success overcoming depression, anxiety, I'll be getting into functional nutrition, recipes and tips from the kitchen. And we're going to both get into how to live a long, healthy, vibrant life. 

Speaker 0 (1m 11s): Yes, I love it. Our mission is to help you prevent and reverse the disease and give you hope in the process. Oh yeah. So let's get on the show. How are you doing? 

Speaker 1 (1m 30s): I'm doing fabulous. I just, 

Speaker 0 (1m 34s): You just had a little vacation. 

Speaker 1 (1m 37s): I turned 60 

Speaker 0 (1m 39s): No way. 

Speaker 1 (1m 43s): And then I went on vacation. I went to Barcelona and Lisbon. I've never been there before. And my husband and I had said that until we can walk, we wanted to go around the world and kind of see, you know, especially like major cities to feel like, okay, I'm living on earth and I've pretty much like checked out earth. So this COVID the thing then allow us for two day, two years. And then it was like, you know what, I'm 60, we're doing this. 

Right. And we went to Elizabeth, we went to Barcelona. I've never been there before and I loved it. 

Speaker 0 (2m 19s): Are you going to move there? 

Speaker 1 (2m 21s): You know, I was thinking of one month in Barcelona would be really nice because now I'm seeing a lot of clients I'm on zoom and my husband is working with China, Hong Kong, everything on zoom. And I'm like, 

Speaker 0 (2m 33s): I know, I know it has really helped us out. Hasn't it? Yeah. We've benefited. Hey, how about if I introduced you to the listener? Cause I haven't done that yet. Okay. Dr. Fujian, Zane is a psychotherapist that I have just met and I just got to share her with you guys. She's a psychotherapist or radio podcast, host international speaker and author. 

She has her doctorate and clinical psychology strong work and is a licensed marriage and family therapist practicing online and in her office in Southern California. Good. All Southern California. I love it. Dr. Zane is the originator of awareness, integration, educational and psychological therapy and intervention, and is also the author of six books. Wow. How did you do six books that I did one and it was so painful. 

It's a, it's an act of love. Isn't it? Six 

Speaker 1 (3m 44s): For me. And then it just got to, you know, be shared with people. That's how 

Speaker 0 (3m 49s): That's great. So author of six books, including life reset, I'm sorry. The author of five books. She is also the host of a heartfelt chat with Dr.  at K M E T 1490 am. ABC radio. And she's appeared on the Dr. Phil show and is a guest speaker in universities, including Harvard. Congratulations. Welcome Dr. Fusion. I'm so glad you're here with us. 

Speaker 1 (4m 18s): It's sweet to be with you. And it's so nice to meet you and it's known so nice to meet everybody. Who's going to be with us. 

Speaker 0 (4m 25s): Yes. Well I'm here in New Zealand. You're in California, but this goes out to the world, which is what the beauty is of what we're doing is just sharing this, this information, this nutrition for the brain. I wanted to start off asking you. What about your journey? That's encouraged you to develop the awareness integration theory? 

Speaker 1 (4m 49s): I I'm an immigrant. I originally came from Iran. I was born and then I migrated at 12 years of age, pretty much alone. I had gone through a lot of, you know, chocolate abuse, sexual abuse and neglect. And then I came to the west at 12 and pretty much raised myself. So you could imagine I was a survivor. So by age that say, you know, at the time I said, you know, by age or 30, I want to make it, I want to have my own home. 

I want to have my business. I want to do this and this and that. And I did, I did. And then it was more like I was suffering so much internally, nothing made me happy and I crumbled everything. I got a divorce. I let go of my business. And I was just like very depressed. I'm like, something's not working. So it's not like, go, go, go, have a dream, make it, you're going to be happy. Well, I created the dream. I survived all of this stuff. I made it and I wasn't. So that concept took me to therapy and side-by-side, I started going to all of the, you know, self-actualization seminars. 

So it was the coaching, it was spirituality, it was psychotherapy. And it was like, I was gonna, I was gonna look at me and see what's going on. And so I opened up to this world of amazing theorists and, you know, psychotherapists and educators and all of that. And then I started looking Seville and all of these amazing theories that some go, you know, focus on the brain and the Mo on, on the thought process, some of the theories look at the emotional process. Some of them look at the body. 

Some of them look at the behavior and some of them focus on traumas. And I just went and learned all of them. You know, I learned hypnosis. I learned, I movement desensitization, reprocessing for trauma, other and you know, cognitive behavioral, emotional focus therapy, tapping therapy, anything that was there that was going to be offered. I was going to be the first one that was going to learn it. And then not only worked on myself and went to therapy a lot with those people who, you know, with the, with the type of theories that they were offering learn and to see how it works on me as a client. 

And then I did it with my, you know, work with so many people for 30 years. What are the things that I really saw was that there is, there's an awareness missing. So we don't, we don't raise our children, would making them aware of who they are. Usually we, you know, it's almost like watch the society, watch not pissing off anybody, watch what everybody's doing and do it versus who am I? How am I thinking? How am I feeling? What am I behaving? 

What are my actions? What am I intending? And how do I impact my life with this way of thinking, you know, emotions and behaviors. We don't teach our children. It doesn't happen with parenting. It doesn't happen with, with school systems. So people kind of just grow up, survive growing up, and then somewhere around, you know, twenties, thirties, forties, they're like, oh, what happened? Let me go back and check. And then it's like, oh, look at all of this on, let me like read, you know, redo my life. 

So the first part was like, okay, maybe we all need to create awareness and know the, you know, mindfulness showed up with that. But mindfulness is a little bit about, let me just meditate and watch. I wanted a little bit more awareness of a, a more active awareness that it's not just watching. So it's not just, okay, I've got the camera on, but beyond the, the camera is only the first step. Now I want to own it. That these are the things I'm thinking. These are the things I'm feeling. 

These are the things, you know, that I act on acting upon. And that is how come I have this type of a result. Like the world is as is the world comes to me as it. But I'm also the one who handles the world, right? That's right. You either respond or react. How are you going to do it? Exactly. So I thought that type of unawareness was important for us to now be even taught through childhood. So it'd be taught to parents and be taught to educators and, you know, maybe we could take it to schools so they could, kids could start learning this thing about themselves as they're growing up versus finally coming to therapy at age 30 and learning these things and going back. 

But even the therapy world was more like, you know, you go in and they're like, what did your mother do to you? What did your father do to you? What kind of stuff then is all their fault versus well, yeah, they did what they could. And yes, you went through some traumas and all of that, but what did you make it out of it that some people can fall. Some people can break and some people become resilient. Some people actually grow. So it's like, there's something about us that handles all of the, you know, stuff that happens around the world. And then there was also this part that I saw that we would take as a therapy world. 

We would take people to their childhood and we would refocus on all of those isn't that we were actually retraumatizing people. Exactly. You know? And it's like, well, none of these belief systems are dismantling. The best that is happening is our clients are crying a lot. There's a lot of tissues that are going, they're getting reactivated constantly. And the most that they can do is they're going to get activated. They're going to react at one point, they catch themselves and they challenge I'm okay. 

And I let go, but then they're always in turmoil until they catch themselves. And it was like, you know, what, if we made up these belief systems, then we should be able to dismantle them. But we had to first own them know where they came from when we made those decisions in order to dismantle them. So then obviously from hypnosis, from EMDR, from Winnie of the techniques that are out there, I brought the best that was out there and created this kind of like the formula that you did though. You find the core belief. 

If you could find the emotion and what is in your system, and then go find the earliest memory that you have and bring upon at the time that you made these decisions, and then we integrate it into your system, reinvigorated it from your adult side, who was actually looking from who you are from your strengths, from your resiliency, from skills. You've learned now to that vulnerable side of you who was stuck, who was powerless, who got frozen in what, in time, in a sense and reintegrate this. And then as we do this in every area of life. 

So you, you know, you do go through this process of like, it's a six phase model. So if you go through the four of these phases, which are awareness about my relationship to you, but where does of all my assumptions about how I assume you and all the world thinks about me, feels about me in that and the awareness of what do I do to myself. Cause obviously I carry myself and constantly have a dialogue with myself. Do I scold myself to my nice to myself that I punished myself. So first three phases are this type of awareness. 

And then the fourth phase phases, finding the core belief, going this mantle and coming back and reintegrating coming. Now we do this four phases in every area of your life. So your relationship with people, acquaintances, friends, work money, mate, sexuality, children, siblings, parents, yourself, your, your illnesses, your addictions, your body nature, universe, death, and God at any other area you think you might have. 

I think you've kind of wrapped it up. The reason, the reason I thought we should do this is because imagine that I'm two year old, three year old, and I decide that I'm not good enough because my mother was scolding me at one point or it wasn't paying enough attention to me. And I decided, obviously I'm not good enough. So then I go to school and the first time a teacher says something to me and they're just being the teacher, right. I might say something to all of it, but if the teacher says something to me and I'm like, see, I'm not good enough. 

So this goes in the area of like relationship with others. Then my friend says, which all friends that I don't want to meet your best friends anymore. I'm like, see, I'm not good enough. And then I become, you know, like a teenager and I'm falling in love with somebody. And at the beginning, like, no, I don't want to go steady with you. See I'm not good enough. And then I go to work and everybody's, who's gone to work at one point, got fired. Or they told them, they're not that they didn't get a good evaluation and see I'm not good enough. So you can see. 

And then they become a parent and obviously a one point, and they're not good enough parents. And you can imagine that one little belief that started here, it kind of like, you know, has its web in every area of life. So when somebody comes to work on one area, you see that the thread is also in all the other areas. So I said, Hey, if we're dismantling all the areas because we want to clean up, right. I love it. You're going to clean up. 

We're going to clean up. And then after we go back into, you know, we create an intentionality that, okay, like if I was going to reinvent my life, why was going to be the agent who was actually co-creator of this life with the rest of life? Who do I intend to be like, now that I know my strengths, now that I know my vulnerabilities, what worked, what didn't work throughout these years now, what type of thought process do I intend that I'm willing to take on? What type of emotions am I really wanting to experience? 

Or which ones as they come in, I acknowledge them, but I'm like, no, I don't want to surf there. Which type of behaviors am I willing to do? And which type of behaviors I'm not, I'm not going to do. I'm choosing not to do that. And what kind of impact, what kind of results I want to create and in the outside. So we can create a mission statement. You know, how companies have emissions. Absolutely. We can create a mission statement because this is how I'm going to operate in life and in every area of life. And that's what I'm making that mission statement about who I intend to be. 

Then what I will do is go back to all of these areas of life, almost 21 areas of life, whatever is applicable and then create quite intend to be in that relationship in that area and set up goals and action plans. And, you know, then create a system of accountability buddies and you know, a way that that structure can maintain. So it's a model that is accumulated from a lot of great theories out there, every intense intervention that has worked out there, I was like, bring it into the soup the best. 

And then, you know, we become present and to the present moment, which is what action happens, which your intention and action happens clean up the past and envision a future that calls you forward. And then come back systematically as if like you've got a camera in and a camera out and you constantly do in the day watching observing intending. So you don't have, you don't get stuck a lot in a lot of the noise anymore. As you observe, you intend you act. 

And a lot of that that's happening in our head with those conversations. It's almost like it gets quiet and cleaned up. So you become very efficient. We've done research on multiple demographics and we found that it really on a psychotherapy level, it brings down depression, 75% and the anxiety about 64. Excellent. Yes. And we did this study in Cal state long beach with four classes, the university of university of California in long beach for classes and, you know, depression in youth and in colleges students, is that the highest right? 

And as suicide rates is at the highest. So we went to this group before classes, almost like 300 people. And this one was not even was not a therapy or coaching. It was just them taking the modules from this book, life reset. So we gave them every week, a module of this life reset have different areas that they were having. They would go journal and they would come back and even with no therapy or coaching, just doing the journaling of this model, we still found 64% minimization of depression and 43 anxiety. 

So that was astonishing to find that. And I could tell you, you know, obviously if we're cleaning up the past, we're lifting off depression. If we're becoming the agent of our life and intending and moving to the future or alleviating anxiety, and then because that's happening and because you're empowered, then your self-esteem arises, your self-confidence and self efficacy rises. And it just, life becomes a more kind of a fulfilling life, but you are, you own it. 

You're responsible and you own it. So that's how I wearness integration. God created 

Speaker 0 (18m 15s): Wow. From your journey. I love it. I love it because it's real, it's not a theory. This is, this is you living that experience. I just, you know, our past just has such an effect on us, you know, before the age of 11. I mean, before the age of nine or 11, we believe everything that everybody says to us. I mean, it just gets planted into our subconscious and it's not until nine or 11. I forget that. You're like, you've got a door that you go now, I'm not listening to this. 

So I want to ask you, you know, you briefly said you left Iran, you came to America and you raised yourself all alone. Like what, what happened there? Because there's so many people that have had stuff junk happened in their past. How did you go about with this, with this integration theory? How did you go about cleaning that up? 

Speaker 1 (19m 13s): Well, I was, I was sexually Melissa from age three to eight and I came to, I was in a family of a divorced parents, which my mother was very, very active and famous in Iran. And she was very much into her career. So it was more like, I was just kind of out there trying to figure out who I am and there were beautiful human beings. They just weren't necessarily made for parenting. Right. 

And then because of a lot of the rebellious and rage that I had because of not being parented, it was more like, okay, these opportunities showed up about boarding schools in the United States. And so I was kind of sent to go on because you're too much trouble with your rage. So go on. So I went into boarding school and I was, what age, 

Speaker 0 (20m 5s): What age did you go into boarding school? 

Speaker 1 (20m 7s): So I came at 12 and went to a boarding school in the United States. Obviously I was there. And then at age 15, I graduated high school and I went to the university, but then the revolution in Iran happened. So all of the financial pieces, my mother lost her job and, you know, in entertainment and all that, that was nothing. So at age 17, I had to actually quit school and start working three jobs in order to just live basically. 

So I started working really hard in order to just to survive and then put myself back to school. So I had to earn the money because the money couldn't come from, you know, my family anymore. So I had to earn money and put myself back to school, 

Speaker 0 (20m 54s): Calling all women. Are you feeling depressed, anxious, lacking an energy, having problems, sleeping all night long, waking up with brain fog, or maybe even hopelessness. And you know that there's a better you that wants to come out. Hello, it's me, Dr. Isabel. And wow. If any of this sounds like you, I get you. I have been in this place and I really wish someone who really knew what I was going through would have been there to help me through to the other side of that deep dark place. 

That's why I started the shame-free anxiety and depression community for women only. It's a free and private Facebook group. Would you like weekly coaching to help you become your best self? And how about being inspired and encouraged by other women in the community? We now know that we grow better in community and not alone. The link is in the podcast description, or you can search in Facebook for the shame, free anxiety and depression, community for women it's free, it's private and it's safe. 

I hope to see you there soon. And now back to the podcast, 

Speaker 1 (22m 21s): I think I was the only 15 year old who came and said, I want it to have an apartment. And they're like, well, we don't give you apartments until 18. I'm like, well, what do you want me to do? I need to go have an apartment. So they gave me an apartment. 

Speaker 0 (22m 36s): That's what I, 

Speaker 1 (22m 37s): What I need, or they have, you know, the check of that came from Iran. And I went to the bank and I'm like, here, you know, can I open a bank account where you're not 18? I'm like, what am I going to do? This is my passport. This is my check. Please open the bank account from me. And they did. And it was more like, you know, it's interesting when you, when you are out there in the world and you need it and you create it and you move forward. But I think everything was so much out of survival that when I gained everything that I said, I wanted, it was so much out of survival that I only knew how to survive. 

So the fulfillment wasn't there. And I, although I had reached everything, my self-esteem was down, I was wounded because of the, because of the sexual abuse because of everything else. So that's where the healing needed to show up. And that's where the therapy and a lot of the self progress courses, such as Lifespring landmark and a lot of those on side-by-side with, with the therapy, it was more like for me to get healed, you know, to be reparented again, to come to a place of, of going through every of the trauma that I had, the relationships that I had, and then the decisions I made about myself, about, you know, my parents, everybody else to kind of, you know, bring them into a space that I could recognize my strength and recognize what they've given me as a strength, all the good genes I got from them and all the good behaviors I got. 

Right. And what are the areas that I lacked? What are the areas that I was wounded and to be able to heal that. And I think we all deserve this. We all deserve, nobody deserves to stay in their traumas and stay in those thought process. We all deserve to just have a fulfilled life on earth. What does a fulfilled life mean to you? That's a great question. To me, it's more of having the ability to be with life as is, and you get to like it or not like it, it's okay to attempt to change what you can't like and what you don't like or accept what is, and then enjoy all the areas that are there that are given to you as a gift and the areas that you are a gift and you're giving it to the people like, you know, I came at the, when I say, you know, at 15, when I came and I wanted an apartment, I remember this man with his, with his mother who owned these small apartment complex. 

And he just looked at me. He says, legally, I can't do this, but I get it that you're in a bind. So go ahead, I'll give you the studio. They came with me and we went to shopping with their mother and bought me stuff. And we did all of that. So sometimes, you know, it was, I had it in my brain that I can't trust anybody because obviously I was abused and this and that. And then you look at the world as I came as a 15 year old into a country of 12 year old in the country, but at a 15 year old, completely on my own and people didn't abuse me. 

People took me under their wings. People gave me their love and their strength. So it's more of coming out of that. Oh, you know, I can't trust anybody because I was abused by a couple of people and looked at all these other, the gifts that the world was giving me about all of these people who were just there to give me their love. So it's this kind of perspective that is shifts that you could look at the beauty tolerate or resist and move along the stuff that it's not a beauty. 

And then the other side is how can I promote beauty and bring the best of me out to the world? Because I could be a jerk. Any of us can, I'm guilty, did choose whether I want to bring my jerkiness and every aspect or bring my generosity. You know, my love, my gratitude into every step. And to me, when we can shift those perspective, then we can be fulfilled. 

And every act in every relatedness, that's what I would call fulfilling. 

Speaker 0 (27m 5s): Yes, that's beautiful. And so many people are living wounded, scared sheltered lives, you know, they're afraid of the world. And there really is so much beauty out there if we just allow it, you know, and if we start seeing it, which is one of the things that gratefulness does is being present well, I'm definitely going to be buying your book life reset because my husband and I always have like maybe about 15 books a week, get for each other for Christmas. And we just gobble them up. 

That's like our gifts. And I'm putting your book on my list because I'm sure I will have a lot of things to teach about from there. I wanted to ask you what, before we land this plane, you know, we've been sitting in first class here, what a three, what, three action steps would you be able to give to our listeners so that they can start winning today? 

Speaker 1 (28m 2s): I think the first thing is let's be responsible for our own thought process. 

Speaker 0 (28m 8s): Yes, 

Speaker 1 (28m 9s): It is not the world's responsibility to take care of us. It is my responsibility to take care of me and find, and relate and connect and negotiate with the world around me to do that. So first must be responsible when I'm looking at that responsibility, then know that whatever's happening in here is only mine. The only thing something becomes real is in between us. So B I'm going to be responsible for what I put out here in between. 

Cause that is what becomes real. The Cod dialogue. We have the acts that we do, whether we do a drag, you know, act of harming someone or ourselves or act of gratitude and kindness to another person. So those two are, I think the most beautiful thing that I could ask anybody to do. And the third one is know that you deserve to be happy. You deserve it. So take a stand for it, take a stand for your happiness to reward yourself. 

It's not like I'm going to demand that the world creates happiness for me. The world is the world. It does what it does. It's more like if I know that I deserve it, it is my right to create it. Then I would do anything and whatever is your game, you know, you can do it through spirituality. You could do it through cleaning up, you know, your brain and do the psychology of it. You could do it through philanthropy. You could do it, helping others. However it is that you can get a project bigger than you. 

I think that phrase fulfillment. 

Speaker 0 (29m 51s): Amen. I love that project bigger than you like. Yeah. That's that's so me, I get that. And I love that. I hope everybody got that have a project bigger than you, that will serve so many people. And you're in the schools, which is where it needs to start. 

Speaker 1 (30m 8s): We are, we have one day care, Isabel, that has been doing this for six years and it's astonishing to even be able to do this with pre-verbal, you know, infants and how you teach the parents of how you deal with the kids. So they even, you know, as the closest two years old, they already have a emotional intelligence about how to handle their own thoughts, process, emotions, and how to intend. Then the relationship we have the opportunity to create school classes for junior high and high school. 

I'm going to be a teaching class that teaching a class in university of California in long beach and teaching awareness integration to the students. And you know, so we're starting that in the universities and hoping that, you know, but with the university research, we could also start teaching the teachers and psychotherapists. I created a certification program for psychotherapists to be having this model. And then we also have an app that it would be coming out in 2022 that is for people to go through it, the app, and actually the exercises through the app. 

I've like, you know, 8 million people have an access to this. And one of the ways to have people I have an access to it is absolutely through. 

Speaker 0 (31m 30s): I love it. I love the big thinking to help heal. I love that. 

Speaker 1 (31m 36s): And she needs to eradicate emotional suffering the same way. I think your mission is through your advocates. You know, the disease in a sense as a, as a physician, I think my mission is to eradicate emotional suffering. We're going to have emotional ups and downs. That's being a human being, but we need to eradicate emotional suffering, which is where we hold a grip onto the thing and knowing how to let that go and let 

Speaker 0 (32m 4s): And become your best and become your best. Now, where can people find you 

Speaker 1 (32m 9s): Food, 

Speaker 0 (32m 12s): And that will be in our show notes. I promise, ah, 

Speaker 1 (32m 18s): Social media, whomever likes, you know, LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, all of them. Dr.  

Speaker 0 (32m 27s): Great. And can just lift up your book one more time so people can see life, right. Life reset. Yes. I love it. Can't wait. I love the cover too. And the tree one with one with leaves. The other one bear. I think I want to be on the side with all the leaves. 

Speaker 1 (32m 47s): I think so. Yeah. 

Speaker 0 (32m 50s): All right. Anything else you want to say in the last minute before we say bye-bye 

Speaker 1 (32m 54s): It was a joy talking to you, your, your, like a star that shines your laughter, your energy, it's welcoming. It's promoting it's you're you're. You're amazing. So thank you. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to meet with you, to dialogue with you and to, and to be with your audience. 

Speaker 0 (33m 16s): Yes. Thank you. I look forward to working with you in the future to Dr.  and that's a wrap for us, everybody. Thank you for joining us at the MD and chef team podcast. And before I go, please remember to remain unstoppable, chase down, whatever you are, whatever in your heart know that it's in your heart for a reason and just remain unstoppable. I love you and have a super fantastic day. Bye-bye 

Speaker 2 (33m 48s): Hello, chef Michael here. If you enjoy today's episode, we would love it. If you subscribe to the podcast and left us a review.